When you are saying « I’m not doing this for the others, but for myself », are you sure ?
Our conditionned self may well be part of our self, yet it works exactly as if it was external. It is an « other » just like everyone else.
That is it that makes us feel guilty (« I have watched a movie instead of writing my article »), that make us preemptively feel ashamed (« I can’t go out like this, I look like shit ») and that, on the whole, abuses us like we would never abuse an other person.
So, actually, many things we do « for us », we do them for this part of us that has intriorized all the crap beliefs and judgements of our family, culture and environment.
« I’m going on a diet for ME, because I don’t feel pretty. »
Well, if everybody around you had respected your body since you were a child, and if our society did not promote only one shape and one size of body, you would feel pretty just as you are.
« I must achieve this, I OWE IT TO MYSELF. »
Uh, nope. It’s really fine to want to succeed, but right now, I bet that if you fail, you’re gonna beat yourself up and treat yourself like garbage, so, no, you don’t « owe » this to anyone, including your conditionned self.
When our sense of self-worth is based on our performance or an ideal created by our conditionned self, we don’t do things « for ourselves », we do them under pressure, because we are controlled and manipulated and coerced.
So, it’s time to grab your Magical Spirit Sieve or Magical Spirit Riddle and to sieve those things you think you are doing « for you ».
If your worthiness isn’t hinged on them, if indeed you are capable to love yourself without those things, then yes, you are really doing them for you.
But if you feel like crap when you don’t succeed, don’t achieve, don’t match, don’t get… be aware, your conditionned self is swindling you !
So, keep your eyes open ;)